Nick Offerman

This past weekend was fantastic. We took a night to stay over in the city to see Nick Offerman do "you have no fucking idea what" according to him. And it was awesome. It was essentially him giving an honest and hilarious lecture about how to be successful in life - because clearly he is, as he has a job where they "pay you to gaze at Rob Lowe's magical face."

His opener was his wife Megan Mullaley's band Nancy & Beth and I really enjoyed them. Unfortunately the volume on the mics was a little high so it could get a little overwhelming but I can't wait to see more of them. They even did "Please Mr. Jailer" from CryBaby and we all know how much I love that movie.

We were all cat-calling her taking off her jacket and she said oh just wait until Nick gets out here, then you'll get the nudity you signed on for.

He fulfilled Megan's promise and came out carrying his American flag shirt.

Glowing in a way that only a pale, shirtless man would under bright stage lights.

Some shirtless posing to make sure stage right and stage left 'got a good view of his package.'

His flavor of comedy is not for everyone... it's definitely not for the conservative or the religious. At least, the religious that would be offended by someone spending a good chunk of time expounding on the bible as a fictitious work. He also stressed that he is not truly Ron Swanson, and that if Ron Swanson did the things he was doing, namely giggling and dancing around in a silly manner, that the time space continuum would rip apart and Teddy Roosevelt would step through and punch him in the face.

He gave a list of 10 things that were his tips for a prosperous life:
1. Engage in romantic Love
2. Say 'please' and 'thank you'
3. Carry a handkerchief.
4. Have a hobby. Or discipline.
5. Eat red meat.
6. Go outside. Remain.
7. Avoid the mirror
8. Maintain a relationship with Jesus Christ (as long as it's getting you laid)
9. Use intoxicants
10. Paddle your own canoe

Another aside he made but didn't make it a full tip, was to avoid the internet and smartphones in general. It was partially attached to tip #7.

I'm gonna link their second to last number but it is very. clearly. not suitable for work. Yes, I'm gonna spell it out just in case there's any confusion about what nsfw means and the link doesn't tip you off. The whole show, Offerman talks about how important it is to find and maintain romantic love. How lucky he is to be married to such a beautiful, amazing, sexy woman. How he wakes up in the morning and stares at Megan 8-12 inches from her face. So at the end of the show he re-introduces Nancy & Beth. Megan comes out and starts off by saying after sitting backstage and "listening to Nick say all of these sweet, romantic things about her" she just wants to repay him with a song. Which leads to:   Nancy and Beth feat. Nick Offerman - "Smell Yo Dick"

And to close the show? That's right, they played "5,000 Candles in the Wind"

It's a song from his show Parks & Recreation which really, everyone should watch.

The next day we cut it a little short and didn't stay in SF for long. Ed ran through the city and I hit the treadmill. Sometimes I look back on all the training I did on a treadmill last year and think, how awful. I know I'll have to readjust to treadmill running when we move back to the East Coast especially on days like today when ya'll got that bizarre snow storm! Anywho, afterwards we made a stop by Swan's Oyster Depot finally. It's been on our to-do list since moving here but it's such a commitment. It's like Salumi in Seattle. We had to wait in line for a little over an hour to get a seat at the bar.

There is only the bar, no other seating available. It was worth it... delicious cherry stone clams and a variety of oysters and even a combination salad with a side of chowder.

First cherry stones we've had since having them in Boston

The most delicious green chile sauce. Spicy as all get out.

Combination salad

We made our way back to Campbell and met up with Dad and Debbie that evening. It was really nice seeing them. Debbie asked if we were tired of visitors because we just had Brian and Michelle here. And the answer is no. way. We hardly see anyone so we're always glad to see familiar faces. Last night was also my first time having steak in AGES. And by ages I mean at least a month. It was delicious.

Coming up next for us? Not too much. April will be a very quiet month. Ed's going to try making a duck or goose again for Easter and hopefully it will not end up a scary fireball like that first time years ago... We're going to try and sign up for ballroom classes again and hopefully they don't fall through. Training wise, I'm adding a mile every week from here on out. Yesterday was the longest run I've ever done. Ever. 8.4 miles. I'm still slow but I'm ok with that. I'll improve speed when I finish all this distance training. 13.1 here I come!

Just a little bright sunshine for your Monday courtesy of Ed!