Nick Offerman

This past weekend was fantastic. We took a night to stay over in the city to see Nick Offerman do "you have no fucking idea what" according to him. And it was awesome. It was essentially him giving an honest and hilarious lecture about how to be successful in life - because clearly he is, as he has a job where they "pay you to gaze at Rob Lowe's magical face."

His opener was his wife Megan Mullaley's band Nancy & Beth and I really enjoyed them. Unfortunately the volume on the mics was a little high so it could get a little overwhelming but I can't wait to see more of them. They even did "Please Mr. Jailer" from CryBaby and we all know how much I love that movie.

We were all cat-calling her taking off her jacket and she said oh just wait until Nick gets out here, then you'll get the nudity you signed on for.

He fulfilled Megan's promise and came out carrying his American flag shirt.

Glowing in a way that only a pale, shirtless man would under bright stage lights.

Some shirtless posing to make sure stage right and stage left 'got a good view of his package.'

His flavor of comedy is not for everyone... it's definitely not for the conservative or the religious. At least, the religious that would be offended by someone spending a good chunk of time expounding on the bible as a fictitious work. He also stressed that he is not truly Ron Swanson, and that if Ron Swanson did the things he was doing, namely giggling and dancing around in a silly manner, that the time space continuum would rip apart and Teddy Roosevelt would step through and punch him in the face.

He gave a list of 10 things that were his tips for a prosperous life:
1. Engage in romantic Love
2. Say 'please' and 'thank you'
3. Carry a handkerchief.
4. Have a hobby. Or discipline.
5. Eat red meat.
6. Go outside. Remain.
7. Avoid the mirror
8. Maintain a relationship with Jesus Christ (as long as it's getting you laid)
9. Use intoxicants
10. Paddle your own canoe

Another aside he made but didn't make it a full tip, was to avoid the internet and smartphones in general. It was partially attached to tip #7.

I'm gonna link their second to last number but it is very. clearly. not suitable for work. Yes, I'm gonna spell it out just in case there's any confusion about what nsfw means and the link doesn't tip you off. The whole show, Offerman talks about how important it is to find and maintain romantic love. How lucky he is to be married to such a beautiful, amazing, sexy woman. How he wakes up in the morning and stares at Megan 8-12 inches from her face. So at the end of the show he re-introduces Nancy & Beth. Megan comes out and starts off by saying after sitting backstage and "listening to Nick say all of these sweet, romantic things about her" she just wants to repay him with a song. Which leads to:   Nancy and Beth feat. Nick Offerman - "Smell Yo Dick"

And to close the show? That's right, they played "5,000 Candles in the Wind"

It's a song from his show Parks & Recreation which really, everyone should watch.

The next day we cut it a little short and didn't stay in SF for long. Ed ran through the city and I hit the treadmill. Sometimes I look back on all the training I did on a treadmill last year and think, how awful. I know I'll have to readjust to treadmill running when we move back to the East Coast especially on days like today when ya'll got that bizarre snow storm! Anywho, afterwards we made a stop by Swan's Oyster Depot finally. It's been on our to-do list since moving here but it's such a commitment. It's like Salumi in Seattle. We had to wait in line for a little over an hour to get a seat at the bar.

There is only the bar, no other seating available. It was worth it... delicious cherry stone clams and a variety of oysters and even a combination salad with a side of chowder.

First cherry stones we've had since having them in Boston

The most delicious green chile sauce. Spicy as all get out.

Combination salad

We made our way back to Campbell and met up with Dad and Debbie that evening. It was really nice seeing them. Debbie asked if we were tired of visitors because we just had Brian and Michelle here. And the answer is no. way. We hardly see anyone so we're always glad to see familiar faces. Last night was also my first time having steak in AGES. And by ages I mean at least a month. It was delicious.

Coming up next for us? Not too much. April will be a very quiet month. Ed's going to try making a duck or goose again for Easter and hopefully it will not end up a scary fireball like that first time years ago... We're going to try and sign up for ballroom classes again and hopefully they don't fall through. Training wise, I'm adding a mile every week from here on out. Yesterday was the longest run I've ever done. Ever. 8.4 miles. I'm still slow but I'm ok with that. I'll improve speed when I finish all this distance training. 13.1 here I come!

Just a little bright sunshine for your Monday courtesy of Ed!

Yosemite 2.0

Well folks, I've been slacking on here haven't I? I've been a bit preoccupied... visitors, training, dieting, and well... ok I don't have a great excuse. Mostly I just didn't want to write another post about running and how dieting makes me so hungry sometimes I could punch through a wall like the hulk. So here we have a nice little post about Brian & Michelle, elephant seals and Yosemite!

I should say, I cherry picked a couple pictures from Michelle's album (pretty much all the pictures with actual people in them) so thanks for being such a great photographer Michelle! :)

We picked them up from the airport and went straight to Half Moon Bay for a little beach time and a brewery for which we had a Groupon. The weather has been ridiculously nice lately but the beach was still chilly - as all Northern California beaches are...

That did not stop this from happening:

 No pants! (Which in my head will always be said the way Fred says "No panties!" in Drop Dead Fred)

They were gallantly rescuing what turned out to be an empty suitcase from the ocean.

We all got a little sun and caught up while the boys dried off. The next day the real adventures began!

We made our way to Ano Nuevo beach to see the elephant seals - large males and little pups who were called weaners. Yes, there was no end to the stifled giggles over the number of times our guide talked about weaners and weaner pods.

The houses below were used for navigation but abandoned when they set up more advanced services that didn't require someone manning it at all hours. The houses are abandoned now and infested by sea lions. Our guide showed us a picture of the insides... it is unpleasant. But would be a great set for a horror movie - if you didn't have to wear hazmat suits to be there.

The first big male we saw is below. Let me just say, they did not move very much. The guide said physical activity in their body was something equivalent to running a marathon in a wet suit with a fur coat on top on a summer day. I would not want to move much either.

And the weaners! They were adorable. They also looked incapable of moving but just because they were so ridiculously fat. Honestly, it was like scene in A Christmas Story when Randy can't put his arms down.

Michelle took this one, I love it.

We watched this guy make his way in from the ocean and then make the exhausting trip up the beach.... only to cause a ruckus with some other males and then chase another female into the water for ages.

From there we made our way to Yosemite. Traffic was... not pleasant, but that's what we get for going through the east bay instead of around it. Oh did I mention we rented a car? You can imagine my surprise when Ed and Brian came home with this:

Ed swears he asked for a Corolla. Suuuuuuure he did...

Either way it made for a fun drive to the park. We stayed overnight in Mariposa, driving into the park the following morning. It was even better than I remembered, with all the waterfalls rushing and the Merced river going gangbusters.

Bridal Veil

The boys risking life and limb. You know, the usual.

The spray from Bridal Veil was crazy. My hair was soaked just from the few minutes of standing there at the base. It was pretty incredible.

Tunnel View lookout spot

We made our way over to the trail we took with Dad and Debbie before. The top of it was closed for the winter, (the scariest part) but that was alright. It made for a really beautiful hike and felt good to get out and get some exercise. 

We had a wonderful lunch at the base of El Capitan but didn't take any pictures.... oops! I guess we were a bit tired by that point.

Look at how teeeeeeny Brian looks in comparison to it all

This same coyote was there when we drove in. And even though I know it's a coyote, I like to think it's a 'toy dire wolf' :)

It was a really great visit. It's too quiet without them here! I'm so glad they could come out and that everything went so well.

Like I said I've been running... 7.45mi this past Monday and this Sunday will be my longest run to date at 8mi. I'm excited because apparently there is a dam and a big ole water reservoir I haven't seen yet. And based on the number of pictures I take, you can see I love running by the water. I feel a little bit less like I'm running through the desert, dying of thirst and exhaustion. I'm still only down about 12lbs... since the friends visit I kinda plateaued but I'm hoping I'll break through that this upcoming week. That's all I'll say about that!

It feels like summer is right around the corner here and I can't wait. We have a bunch of visits lined up including a trip to MD for my sister's baby shower! Yes, I'm going to be an aunt and I cannot wait. I know Omi is disappointed it's not twins but I'm a bit relieved. Now I can spoil that one little niece or nephew like crazy and not have to split the riches. :) Congratulations Ck!